Spring 2002Soccer Homecoming
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Dream
I had a dream last night that I was a zombie amongst a vast zombie army. Our skin was white, and we posessed super-strength. We hated killing, but our actions were controlled by a powerful, unseen mind. Our commander was a red werewolf who was more vicious than any zombie or any other beast of hell. We attacked underground refugee cities and slaughtered the humans within. While trying to track down a child I caught a glimpse of what the world looked like above ground. The image was so powerful that I became human again. What remained of the human race congregated and built a fortified city. When the hope of survival seemed dim, alien ships came from outer space and dropped packages of food and health supplies. My friend was labeled an Elder by the new system of government although he was no older than me. We had to escort him to the very outskirts of the city for his exile as an Elder. He would constantly be in peril of being the first victim of an attack of the undead army.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
A Letter to Tetris
Dear Tetris,
This letter is an official invitation into the Hall of My Bitches. That's right Tetris! It all happened last night when I was at level 15, the L's, the Z's, and the T's where dropping like DFA, but I was not going to stand down. The four-blocked lines, the squares, and the backward Z's were raining down like fire and brimstone, but I was not fazed. I was holding my own, and you got nervous. I was only four lines up from the bottom when the screen froze and the words "Game Over" appeared. You gave up my former friend. You couldn't take the heat, so you got out of the kitchen. I Gamed Over you, Tetris. You are now my bitch, so shut up and take your seat next to Mario Brothers 3, skeet shooting, and DDR. Hang your pitiful head in humility amongst Calculus, home-made pizza, and my roommates' dog, Boscow. You will only speak when spoken to. You will not be cuddled after sex. You have even lost your right to vote. I once respected you, but after the night of July 1st, 2008, you became my bitch. Don't fuck with me, Tetris. I will fuck you up!
Sincerely,
EDW
This letter is an official invitation into the Hall of My Bitches. That's right Tetris! It all happened last night when I was at level 15, the L's, the Z's, and the T's where dropping like DFA, but I was not going to stand down. The four-blocked lines, the squares, and the backward Z's were raining down like fire and brimstone, but I was not fazed. I was holding my own, and you got nervous. I was only four lines up from the bottom when the screen froze and the words "Game Over" appeared. You gave up my former friend. You couldn't take the heat, so you got out of the kitchen. I Gamed Over you, Tetris. You are now my bitch, so shut up and take your seat next to Mario Brothers 3, skeet shooting, and DDR. Hang your pitiful head in humility amongst Calculus, home-made pizza, and my roommates' dog, Boscow. You will only speak when spoken to. You will not be cuddled after sex. You have even lost your right to vote. I once respected you, but after the night of July 1st, 2008, you became my bitch. Don't fuck with me, Tetris. I will fuck you up!
Sincerely,
EDW
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